In Love.

I don't think I've ever been so broken yet so in love..

If someone had a second to ask how I'm really doing, this is how I'd respond,
I'm heartbroken. But, I'm also so, so in love with my God.
I feel like at any moment I could completely fall apart.
Yet, I know every broken piece of me would be caught.
I feel as though my heart is being torn apart.
Yet, I feel it also being healed.
I feel the overwhelming temptation to give up, to quit.
But along side it is my passion, desire and commitment to keep going.
And I will keep going, no matter how much it hurts.
And it does hurt.
This hurts like hell.
Its killing me.
But every time I die I am restored, renewed, recreated, and given new life.
Every time I die, I come back to life, and understand a new depth of Love.
And that's what all this is about, that's why I hold on, that's why I push forward - it's because I'm loved. I am beloved. I am in love.
I am living in Love, itself.

--Peace and Love.

I Surrender.

HAHAHAHAHA! ...

I'M DONE!

I surrender, you've won.

Because I will no longer participate

in your endless cycle of straight up just hate.

This isn't no game, to me

someday you'll wake up and finally see

but even then

you still won't believe.

You can say that I'm bitter, say I condemn

but you are the one who - with a kiss - betrays his friends.

You can tell me I'm brainwashed, call me a fake

but I mean, lets be real here - who's even awake?

Love is only love.. when it follows your conditions?

Well thanks but no thanks, see I've got this other mission.

The calling is clear, the sacrifice great

but I would rather die

everyday

than accept that your love is the only way.

"Follow your needs, wants, feelings and pleasures."

I'm sorry, I can't, cuz with Him I've found true treasure

see..

you try to convince me that you've got the better life, well..

I've got news for you, friend,

a life of guilt, shame and brokenness sounds like a life straight from hell.

Since when was your way the best that there is?

I've got a God who loves me, and my life is His.

You make taking up your cross sound like some kinda hoax

but my Jesus did that, this isn't some joke

and as He hung up there, dying for me

His blood whispered, "Come, die, and you will be free."

But that's too hard!

You say it's too tough to swallow

but He doesn't want our love, you see, if its shallow.

He gives us EVERYTHING!

Haha.. are you still awake?

And all that He asks is that we do the same.

So come on friends, lets give ourselves away

and fall in love with this God
for real
today.

--Peace and Love.

Look Deep Inside Your Heart For Some Change

We're hungry.

No, we're starving

and everyday we die from lack of something to eat

and everyday we cry for our cold hearts to be warmed,

but we're asleep.

We stand there

bundled up in our hand-me-down wear

hoping someone will have the decency to care

that we too have been broken, and correction,

we too have fallen short of perfection.

But with haughty eyes so glazed that they glare

apathetic themselves, they've got nothing to spare.

"They'll spend it on booze, use it for drugs.

Why should we help? They're societies thugs!"

So with our tail between our legs, we slowly crawl away

nobody accepts us, so why should we change?

We accept our fate

we're homeless. We're orphans. We're fakes.

But I'm sorry

did Jesus really die so we could live this way?

carrying the cross, drying in shame

He hung up there

bleeding out His invitation to something better

resurrecting in three days to give His promises power

yet even in this truth our hearts have turned sour.

We get angry at Him

asking, "Why don't You feed us??

I thought we were Your children!"

but in reality

He spoils us rotten.

Church..

When will we wake up and see this issue

that we've sold our souls for a cold bowl of soup?

America don't care cuz they see nothing different

just bums in the street trapped by their own ignorance.

Church..

When did we become so indignant?

Lets get down on our knees

and I mean really pray

its time to repent, bride, its finally time to change.

We are His children, we receive the inheritance

it's about time we start living in this confidence.

We are His bride, He's given us His love

it's time to stop running, cuz He is enough.

So lets stop begging for something to eat

when He told us His flesh is all that we need

see my friends,

The King of the universe invites us to dine

His body's our bread, His blood is our wine.

--Peace and Love.

Beloved

How can I express these things that I'm feeling?

I need a new entire alphabet to voice these thoughts I'm concealing.

But words don't explain this truth that I've found

I've been bound

up by darkness, lies and deceit

when all along, there's been a God who loves me?

Loves

me?

Now I'm not talking about this kiss

that stole my heart and innocence 

the sweetness in his lips

left me hungry, thirsty, desperate for more, see

this lust-filled love left a hole in me

as I sat there, crying out to a God I no longer believed

in, trying to let reality sink

in. Either something was stolen or I gave it away

but that kiss I thought said "I love you" was actually sent to take

me. Take me to a place where darkness was my friend,

my life became a lie, I was too broken to mend. 

A child never forgets

the tragedies his early life begets

when life becomes more than imagination

when games and toys are used for the emancipation

of the mind, from the heart, from the soul

see, how lust leads us to a black hole

of mindless searching, desperate longing for

something, someone, to offer us more.

Well let me tell you here and now

this amazing truth has somehow been left out

of religious churches of political beliefs

by people who are trapped in their made up philosophies

that there is a God who knows what I've done

where I have been and who I've become

but He doesn't look down like that disappointed father

He doesn't reject like that heartbroken mother does her daughter.

No,

this God is about more than

this superficial, conditional love, and

He wants to love me.

He wants

me.

After years of trying to get me to see

that all my life He's been chasing after me.

He says I'm His, I barely even know Him

my eyes have been blinded by all of this sin I don't wanna show Him.

But His love is too strong 

too powerful to keep out

I beg, take everything that You're not about 

away. I don't want it

anymore, today I submit

to You, the real Lover, the real Friend

the One who stepped in and made everything different

who showed that love is more than all I've known

that love is life itself

He died so this would be shown.

See, all my life I've been lied to

I thought the purpose of love was to simply be used

but God came in and showed me

that He has a love and life to offer me

that's real.

--Peace and Love.

Come Away With Me

I step into Your glory

into Your holy presence,

and all I have to offer is this heart.

My soul is overwhelmed by Your holiness

I'm struck to the ground in fear of You.

I bend my knees and bow before Your majesty.

But then I look up

I see my Lover running to me, and

my heart is thirsty. My soul yearning to touch my God.

My heart is trembling, my body stumbles

as I chase after my Lord.

He's running to me with His arms wide open

I stretch out my hand

I struggle to control this overwhelming love

burning inside of me.

I fall at His feet

and weep

in my unworthiness and gratitude

but my Lover wants to dance

He picks me up

He holds on tightly

He leads in this Song of all Songs.

I, am, forever

my Beloved's

and He is forever

mine.

--Peace and Love.